Our brains are experts at answering questions, and their most specialised knowledge is about ourselves. Every time we ask a question we receive an answer. The quality of the answer matches the quality of the question. For this reason, it is important that we do not ask ourselves limiting questions as these will only strengthen the beliefs that hold us back. For example, if you ask questions like ‘Why do I always screw up?’ your brain might immediately respond with ‘Because you’re a failure!’ If you ask ‘What can I learn from what happened?, however you are likely to get a relevant and informative answer.

Asking questions is one of the best ways to change beliefs, because people attempt to act rationally. If after asking questions you realise that a certain belief is illogical, you will feel more internal pressure to change that belief. A belief that appears to make perfect sense is difficult to change.

Before you ask questions about your beliefs, you need to know what they are. If you do not have one in particular that is becoming a nuisance, or a great one in mind that you are trying to strengthen, turn to the beginning of the chapter and review the section on discovering your beliefs. You might want to question just one belief so that you can spend some time on it and allow yourself to answer the questions in more detail. You can question your beliefs whenever you realise that they are interfering with your actions, or as a preventative exercise.

Ask any questions you like about your belief, but be careful to select ones that will help you reduce the strength of a disempowering belief, not increase it. Obviously, you would ask different questions to strengthen an empowering belief. Some good questions to reduce the strength of a belief may include:

• In what ways is this belief absurd?
• How could this belief be proved incorrect?
• Who taught me this belief and is that person worth modelling in that area?
• What will it cost me in the long-term to keep this belief?
• What will it cost my loved ones in the long-term if I keep this belief?
• Is there anyone, anywhere, with my problem or limitation who has succeeded in spite of it?

Some good questions for increasing the strength of a belief may include:

• In what ways would this belief help me in my life?
• What are the benefits to me and my loved ones if I feel strongly about this?
• What experiences have I already had that prove this belief correct?

It may take several sessions of questioning to change a belief, especially one that has been a part of your thinking for many years. Once a negative belief has been challenged and proven wrong, you can replace it with an empowering one.

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