‘Chapter 12: How to Change Your Behaviours’

If there is anything in your life that you want but you haven’t yet achieved, it is time to take some action. All the positive thinking in the world will not help you to achieve your goals unless you take some action towards their attainment.

A synergy between your beliefs, your perceptions and your behaviours will allow you to achieve your goals faster, but it is the changes in your behaviour that will get you results.

These strategies will allow you to change your behaviours even if you are afraid to, or are not sure if you can. The truth is, you can do whatever it takes. But you have to start immediately, because ‘tomorrow’ never comes.

If what you are doing isn’t working, or it is satisfying you in the short-term but not the long-term, you need to pay attention and change your approach. Take some time out of your schedule every week to consider whether your actions are creating positive results in your life. Don’t just blindly persist at something that is not working.

Mira started her business Ultrafunki on a small budget. She was designing and manufacturing limited edition handbags, and started out doing much of the production work herself. Her output was 15 bags a week after long hours of work.

After a string of publicity, Mira was forced to change her approach. While she wanted to keep the bags unique, the orders were coming in too quickly and for too many bags. Stores were waiting up to six weeks to receive fresh stock. When she received a short-notice international order for 200 handbags, Mira agreed it was time to get help.

After advertising for staff for three months with no success, Mira felt frustrated. She didn’t see herself as large enough to require a manufacturer. Finally, she decided to take the plunge and leverage the business to a new level. After contracting out the production, Ultrafunki started selling four times the number of bags. Mira now knows that changing her approach is an ongoing process. She is currently in the process of relocating and finding a larger manufacturer so that she can increase her output further.

Sometimes you need a fresh perspective to change your approach to a situation. When I began working in business finance, we had an inefficient system for collecting documentation from our clients. Frequently, we would complete a significant amount of work before discovering that the client was either no longer motivated enough to provide the documentation, or that the documentation showed poor loan repayment history. The result? A lot of time and effort wasted. Fortunately a new staff member solved the problem in her first week when she assumed she had to collect the documentation from the clients immediately. It seemed so obvious once implemented, but we were all too used to our old ways of doing things to see the solution.

If you have ever seen a graph depicting compound interest, you will understand why Einstein labelled it the eighth wonder of the world. There comes a point where the chart just seems to take off on a steep uphill climb. You have the opportunity to compound your abilities, skills, successes and positive emotions in the same way.

The most successful people attempt to make improvements in their lives every day. Each day builds on the previous days at a new, higher level of achievement. You can do the same by practising some form of self development every day. Even if you spend only ten minutes a day before you go to bed, it will have a great impact on your life.

While he was always a good long-distance runner, Dave attributes his success as a triathlete to strictly following his training program every day. Despite working and studying full-time, Dave spent three hours training each day. With
such consistent practice, each small improvement built on his previous efforts. Dave had been successful locally, but wasn’t expecting to be able to match the national champions. When he won the national title for his age group, he was happily surprised!

Sometimes to get through life we have to ignore the cowardly lions within, and march ahead. You can act your way into feeling brave and courageous by doing some of the things that scare you.

Ask yourself, ‘If I was totally fearless in this situation, what would I do? How would I behave?’ And then do it! Even if
you don’t make it this time, you will have put on an impressive show and you will be less afraid when you try again.

I have always been averse to taking physical risks, and so the thought of extreme sports has never interested me. But when I was given the opportunity to jump out of a plane 13,000 feet above Nelson in New Zealand, I decided to take the plunge. Just the thought of sky diving was well out of my comfort zone – I have always had a fear of heights – but once I made the decision I knew that I had to follow through.

Once I had faced my fear, the change in my confidence levels was immediate. After bursting through my comfort zone, I found myself more easily able to take on other challenges.

Now when I need courage, I mentally take myself back to other times that I have taken on my fears. The resource of courage is there whenever I need it.

When you are stuck in a negative state it will affect the way you think and act. To get back to a neutral, or even a positive frame of mind, you will need to distract yourself. It doesn’t help to struggle through an unresourceful state, because it will take much longer to complete what you are working on and it will end up a lower standard.

The more abruptly you can distract yourself, the better. You might like to try:

• watching one of your favourite comedy sketches
• laughing out loud
• calling a friend with a great sense of humour
• abruptly changing your physiology by dancing, exercising or clapping your hands
• playing your favourite music.

You can distract other people in a similar way. It can be very effective because you have the benefit of surprise.