‘Chapter 07: Your Perceptions’

‘There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.’ – William Shakespeare

Perception is the application of meaning to the experiences we have in our lives. Any emotion, positive or negative, is generated by our underlying perception of what the experience means. It happens automatically every time we interact with the rest of the world. How we think about any situation determines how we feel, and how we feel determines our behaviour.

What an event means is different for each person. We view the world through filters that have built up with time and experience. Our filters include our personalities, attitudes, and beliefs. Many were formed by our upbringing, but as an adult we may change any filters that no longer suit us. Some filters, such as our gender, cannot be removed, but they can be opposed. There are differences between the ways men and women perceive situations, but the differences can be reduced with awareness of the other’s perspectives.

Most disagreements between people result from differences in perception. Without attempting to adjust our own perspectives and see things from others’ points of view, communication may at times feel like running into a brick wall. Fortunately, once we have the ability to change the way we perceive situations, our relationships are able to flourish.